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Books on Adoptive Parenting

Guidance for raising your adopted children. Learn about adoption issues from those who have gone before...
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nuturing adoptions Nuturing Adoptions
by Deborah D. Gray

Although this book is directed toward children who have been neglected or traumatized, it has helpful information for most parents of children who are adopted. Gray explains that unless they are adopted at birth, that most children experience some trauma in the adoption process, perhaps neglect or malnutrition in an orphanage or the disruption of transition from one care situation to another. She describes many behaviors that these children can exhibit, which might be attributed to other causes or misunderstood. But what is wonderful is that she describes many specific things that parents can do to help their children. Every time I read one of her books I wish she was available as a therapist to all adoptive families!
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How to create an adoption lifebook Dim Sum, Bagels, and Grits : A Sourcebook for Multicultural Families
by Myra Alperson

"Insight into combining cultures, confronting prejudice, developing role models, and locating multi-cultural resources." (Adoption Advocates International)
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How to create an adoption lifebook LifeBooks : Creating a Treasure for the Adopted Child?
by Beth O'Malley

Create an adoption book for your child - great advice and encouragement to get you started. (Allison Martin)
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The Connected Child: Bring Hope and Healing to Your Adoptive Family
By Karyn B. Purvis, David R. Cross, and Wendy Lyons Sunshine
"This parenting book provides detailed and practical techniques parents can use in teaching their children appropriate ways to behave, while responding in a loving manner. Parents are seen as guides and teachers who can help their children attain balance, self awareness and self esteem by teaching them how to handle strong emotions and impulsive reactions to upsetting events and circumstances." (Allison Martin)
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Parenting adopted toddlers.

Toddler Adoption
By Mary Hopkins-Best
"For first time parents, the book "Toddler Adoption" provides a thorough overview of the childhood stage of one to three year old children and the challenges and joys of the adoption of a toddler." (Allison Martin)
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Our Own for those adopting older children

Our Own - Adopting and Parenting the Older Child
By Trish Maskew
"It should be required reading for anyone who is considering adopting an older child." (Susan Hall)
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The Family of Adoption : Completely Revised and Updated
by Joyce Maguire Pavao
"Another must-have book by an adoption therapist, herself adopted, about identity formation and challenges through the lifespan. Particularly useful for understanding adolescents and young adults." (AAI)
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How to create an adoption lifebook Adoption Lifebook: A Bridge to Your Child's Beginnings
by Cindy Probst

Create a gift that your adopted child will treasure for years to come with this thoughtful and practical guide. This fill in the blanks Adoption Lifebook propels you step by step through the writing process, integrating their adoption history into your child’s unique story. (Allison Martin)
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Creating Ceremonies Creating Ceremonies : Innovative Ways to Meet Adoption Challenges
by Cheryl A. Lieberman and Rhea K. Bufferd

"A guide to producing and enacting family scripts which mark key transitions in adoption for school age children." (Allison Martin)
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Lucy's Family Tree
by Karen Halvorsen Schreck
"One adopted girl's approach to this common classroom project."(AAI)
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Breastfeeding the Adopted Baby The Post-Adoption Blues : Overcoming the Unforeseen Challenges of Adoption
by Karen J. Foli and John R. Thompson

"This book provides an introduction to a number of challenging issues adoptive parents might encounter during and after adoption. It explores the possible disconnection between expectations and realities of your adoption and the adoption process - expectations of yourself as a parent, expectations of your child, and expectations of others. This is sure to be an important source book for those preparing to adopt, for parents who have already adopted, and those who comprise the support system for an adoptive family. (Allison Martin) "
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Raising Adopted Children, Revised Edition : Practical Reassuring Advice for Every Adoptive Parent
by Lois Ruskai Melina

"A practical manual covering all the basics with new sections on attachment and bonding, international adoption and open adoption." (Adoption Advocates International)
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After The Dream Comes True
by Michelle Gardner

"After months or even years of prayers, dreams and effort, your child is finally home. The days and months ahead will quite likely stretch you in ways you weren't expecting. Geared toward Christian families, the author uses Scripture and stories of her own adopted children to help you cope." (Adoption Advocates International)
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Being Adopted : The Lifelong Search for Self
by David M. Brodzinsky, Marshall D. Schecter, Robin Marantz Henig
"Classic work exploring adoption as a lifelong process, including the experience of adoptees, developmental perspectives, normality, search for self and sense of loss. " (Adoption Advocates International)
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Adopted Children
by Jan De Hartog

"First published in 1969 as The Children, this book is now out of print but can still be purchased online from and others. Sensitive, funny and heartwarming essays about many different aspects of the adoption experience-slightly dated enough to be amusing at times but mostly just right on target. Worth the price alone is the Appendix entitled Some Common Objections to these Adoptions where he responds to issues such as "adoption is not the solution" and "why not a child from your own country?" " (Adoption Advocates International)
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Adoption and the Schools
Edited by Lansing Wood and Nancy Ng
"A comprehensive collection of articles addressing adoption issues which arise in elementary and middle school. This useful guide also provides a number of practical ways to handle awkward situations and assignments in the lower grades. An excellent introduction for parents who wish to understand some of the ways that adoption affects their child's school experience." (Allison Martin)
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Breastfeeding the Adopted Baby Breastfeeding the Adopted Baby
by Debra Stewart Peterson

"A welcome, new resource for adoptive parents who wish to breastfeed their babies. Parents who are adopting very young children will be encouraged by this book. It is difficult to find a resource for this subset of parents so this is a great addition to the bookshelf. "
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